I had to think about it. It’s possible that we’ve broken those big windows, like, FOUR times now. I can’t recall exact details of each time, but four sounds right.
There was the fireworks test, the pogo sticking, and I think Paste went through on a bike once before. You can’t rely on my memory or Paste’s memory, though.
Anyone of you folks recall exactly?
It’s always nice when everyone’s on the same page, isn’t it?
Or at least reading the same book, which Paste ISN’T. He’s streaming a video of that scary empty-building-but-with-monsters thing while everyone else is reading the latest Management Paradigm Shifting Bestseller.
But as long as he doesn’t rush into anything… or as long as he doesn’t rush into anything without thinking up some really truly rash thing to add to whatever he’s rushing into… Oh, who am I kidding? Something’s gonna get broke. You wait.
You know how Paste comes up with all this clever stuff where he’s one step ahead of someone?
It’s because he doesn’t burn up time with other things. Reading. Personal Grooming. Laundry. Cleaning. Grocery shopping.
Of course, he cut out other stuff, too… Family time. TV time. Videogame time.
See what you can get done when it’s all entirely about YOU?
Genius.
The sun is up on a new day, and now it’s time that someone create order from the chaos that is the new iteration of the Outdoor Galore Store.
Shall it be the Alpha male businessman with the money behind him? The MBA with a knack for bumbling where he needs to bumble? The corporate shark with her steely gaze and determination to carve the world into a shape that suits her? The Alpha male upstart kid with a knack for understanding people and motivations without understanding that he has a knack?
It’ll probably be Nikki, who’s just looking for some job security, y’know?
Oh, the end of the day, when it’s time to assess, reflect, and refine your goals for the following morning, right?
You just need a trusted ear, and a moment to bend it a little.
Things have become Mal-adjusted here in the Neighborhood.
If he’s moving in, they owe Mal a welcome basket or something. Y’know, filled with fruit, cookies, a little card telling about popular restaurants and hangouts in the area, a hand grenade with the pin tied to the bottom of the basket and painted to look like a toy…
No. not that last one. Probably.
So, we got Bob house-sitting for Hubris in one house, then next door is Lowell, and just next door to him is Mal’s brother and Mal!
Cozy, right?
Very nice.
What could go wrong?
So the last day of the 2nd Annual OutdoorFest is drawing to a close.
Lives have been changed. Moods have been improved. Crazy &%^$ is in the works!
So… some of you miiiiiight recall why the first panel of today’s cartoon looks the way it does. Good for you. Sharp eyes.
For everyone else, well, you’ll see. Or you can start with the first cartoon in the archives and just read until you figure it out.
Nobody told Durnell that nobody told the Sportsmart Employees that nobody wanted to tell them that they weren’t actually very employed any more.
So, in a way, Durnell did them a service. Unfortunately, that service only served to display the disservice that Mal and the Sportsmart bigwigs were already doing.
So, in a way… nobody’s coming out of this in a good mood.
Now Mal REALLY wants an army of Wildlife to do his bidding. Apparently, they’re like little Mission Impossible spies or something.
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